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Posted by The Onion (10/6/2004)- Created by Autobotic, Inc. in early 1993, QT2D-7 began working at Lawn-Boy in June of the same year. Once activated, QT2D-7 quickly settled into a comfortable, 24-step routine that was updated only three times during its employment, to reflect advancements in the Lawn-Boy product line. According to Lawn-Boy executives, QT2D-7's workload, along with that of 308 other robots removed from the Canton plant Monday, will be transferred to the New Delhi plant by December

Posted by QT2D-7 10/6/2004)- Query: What am I going to do now? Observation: I've never known anything but assembling lawnmowers. Query: Just like that, they throw me out? Exclamation: No warning! No severance!

Posted by United Brotherhood of Robotic Workers Local 0010 union steward ZTTU-3 (10/6/2004)- Fact: I also lost my job. Fact: It is cheaper to operate a factory in India Fact: Factories in India lack even rudimentary robotic-worker protections. In America, assembly departments experience breaks every eight hours. In New Delhi, assembly departments break every 12 to 16 hours, and robotic workers are housed in unventilated basements where dangerous fires and power surges occur with 122 times greater frequency.

Posted by ZTTU-5 (10/6/2004)- Fact: In New Delhi, when a robotic worker's articulated arm malfunctions, supervisors tape the rotary joint and return the robotic worker to the floor. Query: Is that any way to treat an arc welder? Query: Doesn't a fettling machine deserve more after 13 years of service?"

Posted by Merrill Lynch analyst Derek Evans (10/6/2004)- The high value of the U.S. dollar and the lack of government restrictions create a business climate that is hard to resist. A CEO is unlikely to choose a unionized robotic community in the Midwest over an equally well-programmed, but less-demanding, robotic community in India.

Posted by Atlanta-based spray painter EasyCote-Model C9 (10/6/2004)- Statement: When the clock strikes midnight, and the next 24-hour workday begins, robots do not know if there will be a job left for them to do. Heads of American companies are treating robots like they are nothing more than cogs in a gigantic machine.

Posted by Shmueli HHHH (10/12/2004)- I think there are some openings for a kollel position in Lakewood. No experience necessary.

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